I’m sitting before my trusty old laptop. Winters are here in Bhopal. Its almost midnight and this room is dimly lit and very quiet. This is the room that was overhauled recently and right now it even smells clean. I’ve replaced the 11 watt CFL with a 6 watt one and the dim overhead lighting is now even more diffused. Everyone else is sleeping and I can just make out the ticking of the quartz clock marking time through my life’s hourglass. Far away into the night I can hear the soft hypnotic sound of a train passing by; its whistle echoing softly in the cold dead of the night.
You can’t hear these train sounds in the summer. But somehow in winters, all the far away sounds are more clear, even the trucks droning past almost a kilometer away on the highway. I can’t hear the usual horde of crickets outside my window. Too cold, they must be hibernating. The dominant sound right now is the hum of the laptop fan which starts up every now and then to force out some inner heat. Then its all quiet again. The coffee sitting before me is hot enough and my eyes seem awake enough to finish this entry without yawning. Day’s chores seem to be all done and this would be the last item on my agenda for the night before sleeping off the day’s done demands.
I treasure these rare moments and lately they have been fewer and far between. Why can’t every night be like this? It seems like I can write myself into forever. It’s a night for just sipping the coffee and feeling the universe unfold in your mind. Maybe give free reins to the wandering imagination and traverse the barriers of space and time, spread out its arms and fly off wherever it wants. Just float away a few feet above my head if it wants or a million years away in another galaxy watching a sunset against a backdrop of alien suns. Its also a good time to remember moments past that have meant more than just a ticking of the clock. Especially the good ones I want to take with me into forever.
I’ve started some old songs on my tiny laptop speakers. They sound like an old pocket AM radio. Perfect for tonight. The mind wanders. Events that happened decades ago seem like yesterday and still bring a glow to the eyes and the heart beats a little faster. I have a pretty bad memory but some things are easier to remember regardless of time’s passage. I guess those are the memories worth keeping. They are cherished. And as I sit here sipping coffee and listening to old songs from REO Speedwagon, I know a lot of water has flowed under the bridge but it doesn’t seem that way. Not here, not now. I see myself through eyes long lost and my reflection in them is everything I have ever aspired to be. Far removed from reality but it doesn’t matter. Not here, not now.
Its quiet and its magic. Almost like time has stood still for so long that the butterflies in my stomach are a reaction to actual events and not just memories that refuse to fade away across the yellowing pages of my life. That sounds pretty good and I guess it fits the bill just right. So with these thoughts I’ll go back to my coffee and my songs and wish you all times like these when time surrenders itself to you for just a few moments. It may not last but its long enough. Its magic.
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